What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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‘Razor Blade Throat’ Symptoms As ‘Nimbus’ COVID-19 Variant Spreads - Forbes

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Do handsome guys intimidate women or people in general?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Why is Hinduism not polytheistic?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Are today’s baseball pitchers faster than a few years ago, or is it that radar guns have improved and get the pitch speed as it is released rather than as it reaches the plate?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why are women attracted to ugly guys?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Why is fitness important?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Why do people have polyamorous relationships?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Why is my vagina swollen, it’s very itchy. I had sex we used protection, but day after it felt like my insides had a heartbeat as well as itching, the pulsing has went away but it is still itchy and my discharge is yellow, i'm 15, what could it be?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why did the American's mulberry harbor not hold up after D-Day?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What made you recently say to yourself, “Wait. Really?”

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Why is pornography still alive and not illegal? Why doesn’t the government do about tricking women into them?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.